Friday, October 23

Waking up


It's weird waking up from a deep sleep...unsure of where or who you are for a moment until the sun pours through your window and you realize the cool sheets beneath you are your own. I feel like I've been in a really deep sleep for a couple years. I've let myself shut down. I have changed so much in the last 5 years, gotten so far away from the people I love that I convinced myself I didn't need them. (Except for S, the one constant in my life) It's funny how life sometimes gets in the way of living. I've decided my rut is over... I want to be and live a positive life, explore, absorb...be better. I want to wake up from a deep sleep knowing that I am exactly where I know I should be...

Wednesday, December 12

Story

Splotchy started this story… Here’s what I would like to do. I want to create a story that branches out in a variety of different, unexpected ways. I don’t know how realistic it is, but that’s what I’m aiming for. Hopefully, at least one thread of the story can make a decent number of hops before it dies out.
Tams tagged me, here goes...


I woke up hungry. I pulled my bedroom curtain to the side and looked out on a hazy morning. I dragged myself into the kitchen, in search of something to eat. I reached for a jar of applesauce sitting next to the sink, and found it very cold to the touch. I opened the jar and realized it was frozen. (Splotchy)“That’s strange,” I said out loud to no one in particular. My fingers slowly reached towards the jar again. My body experienced a wave of apprehension as weighted blanket covering me as I did so. The jar was completely frozen. I picked it up and stared at it, my fingers stung with little knives of chill. “What the…” again I spoke aloud. Then I realized what had happened with a shock. Suddenly the jar flew from my hand. It shattered creating a collage-like mixture of frozen applesauce and glass shards on my kitchen floor, the lid lazily rolling to a stop across the room. (FranIam)I stood for a moment considering what all this meant. Oh, I knew what it meant, I didn’t need to waste time thinking about it. He was back. And he was mad.I ran down the hallway and flung open the door at the end. I was immediately hit with a blast of cold. I took a step back as I tried to catch my breath. I bent over, hands on my knees panting. He always had this remarkable effect on me. After so much time, it no longer scared me, but it was a shock nonetheless……“You know,” I panted, “There’s no need to break things to get my attention.” (DCup)I woke up in the same position as in my dream, on my knees. I was sweating even though room was freezing. (mathman6293)I was used to the house being quite cold in the mornings, as the night log usually burns out around one AM when I am dreaming cozily under my covers, not normally waking to put a new one on until morning. I was surprised because on the rare occasions that it actually had reached sub-freezing temperatures in the house, I had awakened in the night to restart the fire. I would have been worried about the pipes before P-Day, but there hadn’t been running water in two years and that was one of the few advantages to being dependent on rainwater, no pipes. (Freida Bee)The nightmares began during the following spring. The apple trees came to life in my dreams. At first the trees spoke and I thought they were amusing. That changed when the messages arrived. Lately, their anger was directed at me. (mathman6293)I have been wracking my brain to figure out why they were so angry with me, of all people. The only thing that it could possible be is that I ate too many apples. Too many apples, can you imagine? I thought that was the whole idea. I mean, they kept coming to me saying, “Here, eat another apple, eat another apple.” That night is when the dreams turned to nightmares. Usually I am not one to remember my nightmares, just waking to a vague terror of some sort, but these stuck with me. The applesauce thing is what really terrifies me. (jen)”Bloody Apples!” I fumed as I threw back the covers to greet the new day and the terrors or happiness it might bring. “What was that?” asked Spirit in her sleep, purr filled voice. “I SAID Bloody Apples!!!”, hating to repeat myself. Spirit, in her catty way assumed her sphinx pose and wisely blinked at me. “It’s not the apples that are bothering you, my dear, it’s the redness of them…it’s the blood.” She licked a paw as if she hadn’t said a word then blinked lazily at me. “Do you understand?” she asked, purring softly. She gazed at me, having the eons of past lives lived behind her….gazed at me as if she had all the time in the world for my confused mind to stumble upon the answer. And of course, she did have the time. I had the feeling that my time was running out before disaster struck and I didn’t have the patience to wait for her to come to the point. “What exactly are you talking about?!!” I raged. She licked her paw, swiped her right ear and said…. (Tams) I now tag Crackola. (Crackola) "The apples only bleed when we have caused such a damage that the heart of the mother herself can not mend." Damn cat, I don't have time for riddles, it's cold, my brain hurts, and in my heart I know I have served this land well. All the years we have been here, the strange things that have occured, they have all lead me to this time in my life. You know we were brought here together for this very thing. The cat stretched, turned on her haunches, and faced the door just as the knob slowly started to turn. (I tag Jeremy)http://www.myspace.com/Cedarmtn
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Sunday, October 28

Punkin Time



sometimes

sometimes she talks about angels

tells me everything right down to their wings

sometimes she talks of the darkness

other times she quietly sings

sometimes she sits quietly counting

laying out the tasks of her day

sometimes i weep for her in silence

never knowing just what to say

sometimes the world surrounds her

and i fear my arms aren't enough

sometimes i think that i've lost her

but sometimes she thinks too much

Wednesday, October 17

Animal advice


...because somedays you just need to come home and soak your aching dogs. womp womp!

Wednesday, September 26

The world of dreams

sometimes the darkness outshines the light,

and the hardest person to live with is me,

some days every struggle turns into a fight

and i can only wonder what it all means



thoughts swirl around like a well shaken drink

moments of simplicity become too complex

one minute the worlds spins bright in your hand,

then it vanishes leaving you vexed



memories linger in the back of your mind

watching the sun slowly set in your dreams

nothing and everything blend in as one

and both are as real as they seem



time winds up the ribbon of road laid out

that the moon unfolded in beams

waking again your hands tremble cold

this is the story of dreams....

~d.d.

Thursday, September 13

Never to old for animal crackers

Go ahead and try to tell me you wouldn't grin too if your animal crackers were humping each other!

Wednesday, August 29

Peanuts, whiskey, and squeaky carts

I got the squeaky cart. I always get the squeaky cart. I went to the walk your ass off to get the 5 things you need mart today because I needed lasagna supplies. I woke up at 11 today, part of my new 3 days off a week ritual, and I sat in my pj's feeling lonely and bored til 4 pm. I'm riding the fence this week about feeling sorry for myself. S went back to work, so mon, wed, and fri, she doesn't get home til around 9 because of dialysis. I put clothes on, jumped in the car and doomed myself to shopping. I was in the wine aisle, the florescent lights from the beer case were buzzzing just for me. I probably couldn't have looked more miserable if someone paid me to. Then, around the corner comes this little old lady, white hair, print dress, about as tall as the buggy. She smiled really big and said, where are the peanuts? Without an answer, she proceeded, " M y husband use to be the biggest family clown. I'd buy him cheap wine and peanuts, and that silly old man would buy jack daniels and mix it in with his sugar and wine." Her eyes glowed, and I could tell she needed to talk about him. I felt selfish for feeling lonely. She went on to say she still had the silly old flask he mixed his concoctions in. All the while smiling like he was right there with her. She closed out the brief encounter by saying, " of course this was before he passed." She smiled and was on her way to the peanuts. I turned the corner and felt my eyes water. That was love, and that was lonely, what she felt. It was a sweet moment that happened in the beer aisle at the shopping center, and it felt like more than chance, but I know it probably wasn't. It's easy to be the star in your own show, but every once in a while you get upstaged, and it humbles you, makes you realize millions are daily living in this story book feature. So here's to peanuts, jack daniels, sugar in wine, love after death, and never being lonely... Did I mention I hate getting the squeaky cart.

deamons

Friday, August 10

Rubbermaid Fish Hostle




The first year in over a decade that south Texas has been out of drought conditions, and aside from exibit A and B, I am happy. The rain flooded my yard/house several times this spring, resulting in the lovely concrete floor that use to be the garage becoming our living room for over a month. It all started when the tree fell on the house. Small leak...more rain...yard flood...more rain...2 of every creature began to ring the door bell asking for some dude named Noah. Long story short the carpet went sour. They ripped it up, waited for the insurance guys to give them money, a month later we get the tile ready to lay, happy days are here again. Right? The tile is in the closet, the 55 gallon fish tak had to be emptied to put down said tile, and here I sit in my pajamas, no tile guys, a fish market in my living room, and a message on the machine that says, sorry we can't come til the end of the week. Meanwhile, the cat thinks we have put in an all you can eat sushi buffet, the dogs can't believe their good fortune at having a water dish so large, and I am frantically trying to rig up the pump thingy held in place by a towel and tape so the fish can breathe. All 40 of them. Not to mention the damn donut hole from yesterday. Next blog down if that made no sense. It's 1 :45 I'm going to have a beer....