All The Good People

I am by nature NOT a people person. I'm not a mingler. I don't like crowds, yet at the same time I hate to be alone. I must say it has posed a problem on more than one occasion.
Most of my friends I have inherited from previous friends. A few people have just randomly floated into my life. I like to think I surround myself with all good people. Now by my definition "good" does not mean wealthy, it doesn't mean they are highly educated,(although some of them are) hell, some of them aren't really even all that clean, (I do love me some hippies), and it doesn't necessarily mean they are religious. It simply means they are good. Good to the core. The kinda good you see in calloused hands after a hard days work, the kinda good you see in the life lines written on their faces, the kinda good that would give you the shirt from their back. I want to be good. I want to be one of you. But instead, I have this steady little fire in my belly that sometimes erupts in an emotional lahar. Age is helping to temper that, along with the great vibe I get from some of the people in my life.
I recently met a reike master. She is a spiritual healer. She works on the basis that we can all heal ourselves. I think I believe her, she said she saw me on top of the ladder that day, and thought I looked like the person she needed to talk to. So I climbed down and she shook my hand , and then she said yes, I caught your energy. (I didn't know I was throwing my energy about so much.) and while I don't remember the exact conversation I do know when we had talked, mostly about life and why we were where and who we are, I felt better. So of course I helped her with some plants , that's my job after all, and before she left she told me that I do for plants what she does for people. She stops in every so often just to say hello. To me that's cool. That's good. We all need more good.
I spend more than half of my day outside, and that is good too. I'm never gonna be rich, or famous working with plants, but I can scratch the bumble bees on their back in the evening when they are so tired from eating all day, and I can tell you the time of day from the sun. There is a line in a song that says," don't get me wrong but there are things going on out there that you and I know nothing about." I'm as small as the fire ants that climb in my shoes when I think about how big and wonderful the world is. And that's all good